Shoveling Smoke

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Addendum

I realized I'd forgotten to post something else that is somewhat momentous.

My wife and I have actually been able to accumulate the equivalent of six months' salary.

That probably doesn't sound like a big deal to most people, but it'll be the first time in a long time that a minor emergency won't set us back for weeks on end, playing catch up.

It's in an Orange savings account, earning 4.5% interest, so that's pretty cool.

I'm not the biggest fan of money in general, but it helps you sleep at night knowing that you could live for six months without a job.

JAG

I found out that I was accepted into the Army JAG Summer Internship program. I'll be working for 10 weeks at Fort Bragg, North Carolina.

Shocked, I suppose, is a good word to describe how I feel. They only pick 75 law students a year to do this. When they sent me the email, I saw the email addresses of the other 75. Most were from big time schools, such as Harvard, Yale, and Stanford. Truly out of my league.

I'm fairly sure that the Dean of my law school was quite dispositive in the outcome. He was once a high-ranking JAG officer, and graciously agreed to write me a recommendation letter.

So that's the news from my corner. I'll post more as it arises.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Parable

One day there was a man who lived in a tiny village. As a child, he heard stories of a magical beast, that if caught, would grant him every wish. All of the adults in his village had hunted for this beast for as long as anyone could remember. Most never came close, others caught a brief glimpse, and the lucky few actually claimed to have found him.

Now that he was grown, the man set off to find the beast for himself. He wandered across the fields, crossed rivers, camped out at night, and climbed mountains. All the while, his thoughts focused on the beast. He must find it. He grew more and more tired, and eventually he grew old.

At the very end, he sat down in the meadow, and cried into his tired and wrinkled hands. Then, the beast appeared. It was beautiful, with green fur and gold claws and diamonds for eyes. It sat down next to the man, and said:

You have finally found me, old man. You never gave up. It is unfortunate that it came so late. What is your wish?

"I want to be rich," said the man.

"And why is that?"

"So I won't have to worry."

"Ah. And what has worried you?"

"I've always been obsessed with finding you- now that you are here, I can rest."

"So you worried about finding me so you wouldn't have to worry?"

The man didn't have an answer for that, so the beast continued.

"It happens every time. People are so obsessed with me that they can't see the glory of the mountains they've climbed, or the beauty of the rivers they've crossed. There's no time to rest or stare at the night sky and simply breathe. No chance to pick a few flowers or admire the deer as they graze. They hope to find me, in the hopes of becoming happy. Yet everyday they passed happiness by- in the trees, their family, and the birds in the air."

"I'm so tired," the man said, "I just want to sleep."

The beast crouched over him and closed the man's eyes.

"As you wish."

Untitled

I haven't been posting because there's really not been much to post. I'm at the point where I threaten repetition with every word I type- ominously close to that point where a sitcom has run out of steam and carries on for a few more seasons before shutting down.

I'm officially the Blog world version of Nick at Nite.

I did come to a mini-epiphany a few weeks ago. I think people are drawn to the idea of celebrity not because we think we'll ever get famous, but knowing there are people whose lives are dictated solely by their desires gives us comfort. Getting up early to slay the beast that is life day after day gets tiresome. It helps to know that someone, somewhere, is sleeping in. At least we've got that.

Here's the thing- every so often I see a guy standing on the street corner, asking for spare change. Usually there's either an explicit or implicit sob story to boot. I wonder what would happen if I sat there with a sign that read, "I'm simply tired of working." I think a lot of people would identify with that, and probably appreciate the honesty to boot. I'd give that guy a dollar.

Somehow our society has driven us into an individualistic mentality that strives to get everything and share nothing. And as a result, we all must struggle harder to get the things we need. Somewhat ironic, no?

Look at ants. Simple, common ants. They're smart enough to know that they have to stick together to survive. They work to build a common shelter. They're smart enough to realize that it's easier to build one giant house than one million tiny ones. If one finds food, he tells the others, and then brings some back to the rest of the community. If we were to find a bunch of money in the woods, who would tell the community? No one, would be my guess.

Why? Because we think that if someone else were to find the money, they wouldn't share it either. So we take what we can get our hands on, because that's what the next guy would do. So we don't trust each other because we don't trust each other. Get it? And we each stubbornly roll our own rock up the hill, and kill ourselves in the process. A very lucky few get their rock to the top, and it feeds the illusion that it's normal to achieve success alone. Meanwhile, the mass of men struggle to get a decent grip. And our pride refuses to ask for help, and our neighbor's recalcitrance hinders him from offering- even though he needs some help too.

This is only a country by name. Sure, every time there's a tragedy we run up a few flags on a pole and sing some old songs, but we don't really give a damn. Our country runs to our property line, and stops there. Our only real allegiance is to ourselves, and the little fiefdom we happen to occupy. We can't be bothered with helping others, because there's always someone whose rock is a little bit higher than our own.

Perhaps one day we'll realize that maybe the point of life isn't pushing rocks up hills. That we shouldn't have to work for half our lives to afford a box to live in. That if we built things closer together, our own two legs would serve us well. That we've set up a world where we are forced to adapt to technology, instead of the other way around. That if we made a dog do something it didn't want to do for eight hours a day we'd be looked at with disgust; yet millions of us do it everyday, despite our inherent nobility. That there are far better targets than green pieces of paper to shoot for. That our greatest treasures lie far within us, and not on Amazon.com.

Perhaps- but I doubt it.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Summary

The root canal went well- I felt almost nothing the whole time. Apparently when I bit down, a piece of my tooth broke off and pushed into the pulp, which explained the agonizing pain. Oh well, now all I have to do is get a crown put on and all should be well.

My wife's strange back pain seems to be gone, so that's good. Maybe she's turned a corner. She's had an awful lot of bad luck lately.

A few grades are in. I made a C+ in Business Associations, which is actually a good thing in my book. Due to my stupidity, I had to write the exam, as I had left my power cord at the hospital with my wife. Also, the subject matter didn't exactly mesh with my interests- it's a nice enough topic, but I'm really not going to be a corporate attorney. So I'm not too concerned. Also, with the possibility of a C or D+ seemingly all to possible, a C+ is sweet relief indeed.

In brighter news, I made an A in Electronic Research Seminar. I enjoyed that class- it was interesting, and I managed to learn a few things along the way.

Constitutional Law, Appellate Advocacy, and Evidence are still outstanding. I had a B+ on the Evidence midterm, so I'm optimistic about the eventual outcome. Con Law is probably a B, I would assume. Appellate Advocacy is anybody's guess.

I hope to have some fairly big news I can post on this blog eventually, but I've decided that silence is the better part of discretion at this juncture. There's too much about it I don't know at this point to comfortably share, and I don't want to jinx it.

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Thursday, December 14, 2006

Pain

My wife got out of the hospital two days ago, and seems to be doing fine. They're not sure if it's a kidney stone or a kidney infection, so they told her to drink a lot of water and take some antibiotics. Seems to be working.

In other (pain-related) news, today I was at work and decided to go get a Subway Sandwich. After a few bites, I felt excruciating pain. Bad pain. As in who do I have to kill to make this pain go away. Other bad news: it was Thursday, so I was practically broke. (I am a student, you know.) I drove to where my Mom works, scared her half to death, and she called my Dad, who drove me to the dentist. Regardless of the money issue, I'm pretty sure it was a good thing they drove, because I was losing it. My face had drained of all its color, and the constant pain was spreading across the left side of my face.

I have bruxism, which means I grind my teeth at night. I'm supposed to wear a mouthguard at night, but I get careless. Which wreaks havoc on my teeth. You can bet I won't be making that mistake again.

I got to the dentist, and apparently I need a root canal. So I set up an appointment for Tuesday. In the meantime, the dentist (my new best friend) gave me some Novacaine shots and a prescription for Hydrocodone. Which is also known as Vicodin, like the stuff Dr. House takes. I've only got twelve, so the risk of addiction is almost nil, but I can see why he likes them. What was a brain-shattering pain is now only barely perceptible. I guess that's what opiates will do for you.

Here's hoping that eventually my luck will turn. For now, the pain medication is at least pushing it back.


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